It was just a Tuesday.

I feel so distracted. Do you ever feel that way? It’s like the life I really want to live is passing by and yet I’m still living it. I enjoyed watching the rain tonight. I love to ride in the rain at night. The reason is, you don’t have to turn on your wipers because of the dark. It’s so nice to see the rain to just fall in random place and just glide down the front of the windshield. Somedays, I honestly wish my life was like photoshop. This way, I could change my opacity to 0 and no one would see me. Or maybe in my transparency I could see through myself and to what really matters. There are so many things going on that need my full attention and yet I’m still distracted. But the thing is, I’m distracted by all the things that need my attention. My body and mind just crave to shut down and disconnect, but I can’t. Maybe it partially has to do with a lack of sleep. But how do we focus. Maybe I’m just out of focus. Need to adjust.

Octo…

So as I sit here and watch dateline, my thoughts are somewhat full. They are doing a special on the octuplets mom and I question my own ethical and moral beliefs. Is it right?  There are so many questions and perhaps I could (and even started to) delve into an opinionated rant on what I believe and what I think she should have done. I will have to chew on this for sometime. 

Speaking of thinking, perhaps this can be a good segue into “evaluating”. This has been and is becoming a great time for evaluating. In discipleship tonight, I challenged my friend to evaluate himself. As I have challenged him, I will be doing the same for myself. Perhaps you can be challenged to do the same to you. Who are you? What defines you? What motivates or drives what you do now? 

I’ll leave you with a short deal on Proverbs that may or many not be encouragement….

“The Lord decides what a person will do; no one understands what his life is all about. It’s dangerous to promise something to God too quickly. After you’ve thought about it, it may be too late. The Lord looks deep inside people and searches through their thoughts.”  Man, we don’t have a clue and yet we make bold claims to God without serious consideration of what that commitment looks like. God knows us.

I’m going to Disney World!

Ok, once again, a deceiving title. Nope, I didn’t discover some small little man at the end of rainbow who blessed me with a truckload of money. And I didn’t win the superbowl. I had just been craving a victory that deserved a “I’m going to Disney World” at the end of it. It’s funny how a victory may come. I look for it in so many other things we it usually comes in a small package that I overlooked. Someone gave me a fantastic compliment today. One that for them is a life changing experience. I cannot feel, 1) extremely honored and 2) extremely happy. I am going to Disney World. Right now. In my dreams. Good Night! 

Oh and coolness when I told my nephew I loved him and he smiled like the biggest smile ever. Rock on!

“Everybody wants to be a bodybuilder, but don’t nobody wanna lift no heavy a** weights.”

I’ve been trying to write this blog for the last half hour and I keep getting interrupted, bah! I love the title (there of course is a story which is at the bottom ((and I tried to sensor, but I didn’t, so I apologize if your offended by any use of language))). Ok, now that I’ve thoroughly abused the parentheses and learned there usage in the singular tense, we can continue. Or not, a side note, thanks for all the reads today, I felt special. Moving ever so slowly along…

I was driving home tonight and really began thinking about the truth of the title of this blog, “Everybody wants to be a bodybuilder, but don’t nobody wanna lift no heavy a** weights.” I just realized how true this statement is and how it can be applied to multiple life subjects. For instance, everyone wants to go to heaven but nobody wants to die or everybody wants a truckload of money but don’t nobody wanna get an honest job or everybody wants a cheeseburger but don’t nobody wanna kill a cow or everybody wants Jesus to save them, but don’t nobody want to spend time with him. I’ve just been thinking this direction a lot tonight and how it correlates to my current journey. I’m totally in such a flux process of still growing up. I mean, to some degree we all our, but the choices only get harder from day to day and they aren’t choices you can just avoid. I suppose that life is simply based around choices themselves and we aren’t always going to make the right ones. It comes down to it that we shall inherently be that who we choose to be. Whether we choose to push ourselves or choose to slack or whether we choose to do right or choose wrong. I know that I have and will continue to make bad and poor choices, but I want to make more good choices than bad. I want to choose daily to spend time with God and choose to become the man I’m supposed to be. In the end, we choose till we can’ t choose no more, but God has the ultimate control. Perhaps if we asked for His guidance in our choices, maybe our lives would be a lot different. Maybe we could choose right more consistently.

This blog went a totally different direction than I thought. I know that some think these things are stupid and on some level I guess I can feel that way at times. But hopefully my thoughts have made some sort of difference in the way you think. I pray that you will choose to choose.

(*Title of blog Story- If anyone actually cares. So I decided to google my name today and discover that I was fourth on the list at google for the search “Justin Biggs” woot! Anyway, in my lameness I announced my sad plight of googling my name on facebook. It doing so, it sparked a philosophy professor from my college to proceed to google my name. Upon his doing so, he discovered my alter ego who is a workout guy with a blog titled… “Everybody wants to be a bodybuilder, but don’t nobody wanna lift no heavy a** weights.” THE END.

I daydream of punching small animals.

Ok, so this is not true, but a line from an amazingly clever ad I saw tonight. Maybe I like too many things in life. But I like life I guess. Watched the superbowl tonight with some church folk. It’s the first time I watched a NFL game in about two years. I think what made it the best was the fact of the company that was there. It’s nice to hang out with people and just have a good time and a good laugh. This week is going to be tough and quite heavy, and I’m not sure I’m ready for it. But (lot’s of “buts” tonight) I will never know till I try and it’s not like I can avoid Monday, so here I come! I may make my plans, but God is only the only one capable of seeing them through…

I hate Saturday nights

I feel like saturday night is almost pointless anymore. Saturday night is that prime opportunity for me to experience spiritual warfare. It’s typically when all the things that are seamlessly out of control and out of my control in my life come to me. I fight off a strong “case of the monday’s” on Saturday night. It’s usually where I face failure. I feel the strong sense of failure as a man and perhaps that I will never see a real genuine measure of success. But Sunday always comes. I know my God can be victorious in my life, my circumstances, my finances and my stresses. I know that I can sing that I’m laying down the sorrow (even the amount that I’m facing now) that I face for the joy of the Lord. To steal a quote even… “the night is always darkest before the dawn”. Light is ahead. Hold on. Hold on.

The infamous J Nasty

What an exciting day today! The small business that myself and two friends started was officially incorporated today! (woot! Hail to the chief baby!) That was truly and exciting moment and I am just stoked about the potential that is ahead of us. We had a great day today mostly just hanging out. Needless to say however, we got a lot accomplished. Today has honestly just been another one of those looooong days that seems to end somewhere fuzzy and then just crash. A highlight of the day was the stalking of “Grandpa Gangsta” aka: J Nasty. James had run into the bank to get some money, while Brian and myself were just chillin’ outside. After James returned to the car, he informed us of a guy in the bank who was scraight up gangsta. The only problem, the guy was like 55 or older. We didn’t believe him, so we proceeded to do the only sane thing left to do… stalk. We positioned up outside the bank (totally inconspicuously) and waited for our senior soul man to emerge. Low and behold (and 20 minutes later) our mystery hoary hoodlum finally appeared. Now whether he was of the age James claimed is still yet to be told, only one image of our geriatric thug survived. Examine closely for yourself and watch out for Grandpa Gangsta

J Nasty

*this blog has nothing to do with anything of importance and is subject to making oneself feel less smart upon partaking in a read. Reading Discretion is NOW advised (even though you made it this far…)

The Wine Shoe

I missed it today! I was going to blog some thoughts and I missed it, but it’s here now and I’m gonna push on through!

I am still wigged out about LOST! I need some peeps to fall in love with LOST so we can theorize! What a wicked cool turn last night! If your missing out, your missing out!

Been quite the long day today. It’s sad that I just realized that. Today has been a myriad of feelings from tired to happy to stressed to confused to all kinds of happy to even more happy and then some venting frustration anger stuff(was that last one a feeling?) Anyway, I’m sure you are just so captivated by what happened in my life today. Good news for tomorrow! My first business start-up is going to be officially incorporated. We head up and sign the paperwork. Looking forward to exciting new venture! www.savioursix.com 

Sorry for the random title. Just something I heard today and it felt necessary that that become the title. To be honest, at this point I dislike it, but I’m not going to change it. It’s late, bed…

Here’s some random video for your enjoyment….

…but a person who hates being corrected is stupid.

Never thought I would say it, but I honestly have begun to fall in love with Proverbs. I always had enjoyed reading some of the little sayings, but never really had read into this book of the Bible that much. I have been meeting with a guy for several weeks and we have been going through Proverbs. For me, I have been struggling with consistency and discipline all my life. I make plans and try to commit to myself that I’m going to do something different. Well, I’m not going to commit to myself this time, but to God. There are some major changes to be had and proverbs opened my eyes to some of that…

I was reading through Proverbs 12 last evening and came on some very worthwhile scripture. Proverbs 12:24 says, “Hard workers will be come leaders, but those who are lazy will be slaves”(NCV). I have to be honest with myself, I am very lazy. I mean, I “get” by, but I don’t push myself to work hard. In that sense I have become a slave, I have become a slave to my habits. My life is not dictated but what I would have for myself, but I live my life based on what my body (which is way outs of shape, the workout begins today, yikes!) let’s me do, when I can just “get” to stuff and based on what I want. I can’t live this way. This way doesn’t really include my Savior, he’s just become that tacked on extra piece. No LONGER! Proverbs also goes on to say… doing right brings freedom (which we were created for by the way) to honest people, but those who are not trustworthy will be caught by their own desires. So… #1 Be honest. The only way change is going to happen is that you are first honest with yourself. #2 Prepare for Hard work (aka: sacrifice). People have said anything worth doing is not easy. God hasn’t promised an “easy” journey, but that doesn’t mean it won’t be the most rewarding and amazing journey in your entire life. #3 Trust that God is the only One who can make this possible. …”People may make plans in their minds, but only the Lord can make them come true”. For me, I understand that to some degree greater today than yesterday. So… I’m honest, I’m lazy and I’m a slave. I’m preparing myself already for the hard work and sacrifice ahead. But I know and trust that God will not leave my side and I cannot accomplish in my own strength, but in His. 

Side note, just finished talking with a friend who is a missionary in Sweden. So wonderful to see that God is at work in and among the nations. That there are greater things happening that I’m so not aware of sometimes. 

I’m excited about what God not only has in store, but what God is beginning in my life. I was created for so much. So much. And I live in such bondage and slavery created by myself that include habits, indiscipline, weight, finances and so much. But God has made this man for freedom and I’m going to embrace the life that God created me for!

GP are you with me?

Is anyone still out there? Cause, I’m back. Oh yes, it is time once again to be culturally relevant and unleash on the world all of my thoughts. Ok, maybe not all of them. I’m working on getting back into the habit of blogging. I’ve taken quite a bit of time off and working on some fresh starts for myself. Stay tuned. Blog coming in the morning.